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Tuesday, 22 May 2012

The lady

She's tall, slim and dark-skinned,
Bright smile, long dark hair, straight legs.
Big, bright eyes.
Yes! She's beautiful.

She's mannered, cultured and decent,
Graceful in her walk.
Calm in voice, choosy with her words,
Sweet, adorable and upright.
Polite and elegant in behavior,
Great chef, perfect hostess.
Damn! She's classy....

The perfect woman, looks like she's had a perfect life.
She has smiled so much that you may think she has no problems.
Her gait and her grace,
They make you want to be like her.

But when she was ten and couldn’t wear those elegant heels yet,
Her bare feet had stepped on her father’s blood after he shot himself in the head.
And her body had been defiled and violated when her mother married her rapist step-father.
Her eyes had watched her mother come home drunk and date and marry all sorts of men.

Just behind her smile are the tears she cried when her first husband chose his best friend’s assistant over her.
And beyond her sweetness is the hate she felt when her daughter slept with her own boyfriend.
And though she is friendly to everyone, she has been lonely since both her children stopped visiting.
And every time she finds herself behind closed doors in her empty house, she feels the need to treat herself to some alcohol just like her mother.

Even though she teaches the younger ones not to speak vulgar, she sometimes screams ‘f***’ out loud when she has a nightmare.
And when she talks about her love for God to people, she remembers how she sometimes curses him and how unhappy she is with him.
And when she teaches the teenage girls in church about chastity, she can’t help but feel guilty:
She’s guilty of sometimes licking her lips when the handsome pastor preaches;
And lusting after her best friend’s son;
And imagining what her mechanic looks like when he’s naked…
And when she looks at her bed,
All she can think about is the things she has done on it; and the number of men that have snuck out her house at 4 am after crazy drunk night at bars and even the fact that she can barely remember their faces afterwards.

Lonely middle-aged woman,
She sometimes wishes someone could look beyond her beauty and see her pain.
Beyond the smile and see the drain.
Beyond the dye and see the grey
Beyond the clothes and see how worn out her body actually is
Beyond the perfection and see the weaknesses.
That people could ignore the lady and actually see…